Off and on over the last few years, that I was working pretty much full time, I worked in the funeral and cemetery industries. For the most part I enjoyed it. It was very satisfying to assist people make their final arrangements and help them do so without their over-spending.

The joy sort of went out of the business for me when the national corporations began buying up the local funeral homes and cemeteries. They were more concerned with making a quick buck than in helping clients. At least that is how it seemed to me and the fun and enjoyment rapidly disappeared.

Most people view those working in the funeral and cemetery industries as solemn, staid and reserved without much of a sense of humor. Movies and television have done much to foster this image of funeral directors and morticians but I found them to be quite the opposite.  Almost without exception they have a wonderful sense of humor and are fond of sharing funny stories. It didn’t matter whether the situation involved them or others, if it was funny, it was shared.

The following is one of my favorite stories from that time and no matter how many times I hear it, I chuckle.

A young preacher was asked by the local funeral director to conduct a graveside burial service for a man who had no family or friends. The preacher left early for the cemetery but quickly got lost, having made several wrong turns.

Eventually, a half hour late, he saw a backhoe and its crew, but the hearse was nowhere in sight. Nearby a few workmen were eating lunch. The diligent young pastor went to the open grave and found the vault lid already in place. Taking out his book, he read a passage. Feeling guilty because of his tardiness, he preached an impassioned and lengthy service, sending the deceased in style to the great beyond.

As he returned to his car, the preacher overheard one of the workmen say, “I’ve been putting in septic tanks for 20 years, and I ain’t never seen anything like that.”

You cannot really know anyone unless you know what makes them laugh. With this in mind I will, from time to time, include here short stories and happenings that have brought tears of laughter to my eyes.

I am not sure where I originally found The Golden Belly Button but I read it now and then and always get a chuckle out of it. I hope you enjoy it.

The Golden Belly Button

Once upon a time a young lad was born without a belly button. In its place was a golden screw. All the doctors told his mother that there was nothing they could do. He would have to live with it.

The years passed, and they were hard for the boy, as everyone who saw the screw made fun of him. Then one day, when he was fully grown, a mysterious stranger saw his belly and told him of a swami in Tibet who could get rid of the screw for him. The man was thrilled.

The next day he took his life’s savings and bought a ticket to Tibet. After several days of climbing upteep cliffs, he came upon a huge mona-stery. The swami knew exactly why he had come. He told the man to sleep in the highest tower of the monastery and the following day when he awoke, the screw would have been removed.

That night the man went to the room and fell asleep. While he slept, a purple fog floated in through an open window bearing in its mist a golden screwdriver. In just moments, the screwdriver removed the screw and disappeared out of the window.

The next morning when he woke, the man saw the golden screw laying on the pillow next to him. Reaching down, he felt his navel. The screw was gone! Jubilant, he leaped out of bed and his butt fell off.